Home > All, God, Humor, Religion, Stupidity > Do You Want To Believe In God? Instantly?

Do You Want To Believe In God? Instantly?

Your prayers have been answered. “Believe In God Instantly” fresh breath spray! Awesome!

god spray

I guess now I know why I’m an Atheist. I’ve never had the luxury of trying “Believe In God Instantly” fresh breath spray. The box says…

Surrender yourself to a higher power and never feel alone again!

Miraculously minty, faith-enhancing breath spray.

Oooh. Faith-enhancing. Impressive. I wonder if it would enhance my Faith as much as positive results from a scientifically rigorous study dealing with the existence of God?

I have to admit, the one Customer Review of the product was pretty good…

It took one little spritz.. My breath was fresher, mintier, and the taste of cigarettes was absolutely gone. I felt like I was kissing the holy mother herself. I got this strange sensation, waving through my whole body like electricity. Colors became brighter, everything was more vivid. Anything that moved left lingering, blurred trails. And then it happened.. I saw god.. He had long hair and a beard, loose fitting clothing and resembled my hippy roommate. He said “hey man! did you see a little spray bottle full of mint? I’ve been looking all over for it and I really need to find it now or we’ll be late for the Phish concert.” I handed it to god, a little hesitantly, who just just smiled and laughed. “Thanks dude, have a nice trip!” He even knew I had a long car ride ahead of me, but of course he did.. What a nice guy!

For $4.99, who wouldn’t want to go out and get their Faith “enhanced” by this awesome spray?

As an Atheist, I can already feel my lack of Faith begin to crumble when I think about spraying myself in the face with that small, yet spiritually potent, bottle.

Big things come in small packages, and a lot of Faith can come from a little bit of fresh breath spray.

Read a book. It’s good for you!

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Categories: All, God, Humor, Religion, Stupidity
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