Ok everyone, I just have to share this with you all. I used to have (I still do) a Xanga blog. I was going through it today, reading some of the stuff I’d written like 2 or 3 years ago. I was laughing so hard at some of it. Literally crying. I want to post this one here, from January 31st, 2004. It’s seriously some of the most hilarious stuff I’ve ever read/written.
Alright guys, it’s 6:47am – pointless to try to sleep now. I guess I’ll have to force myself to stay up, making tomorrow seem like quite a long day to say the least. Who knows? Maybe this will put me back into a “normal” sleeping pattern. It’s kinda funny. Joanna is going to be calling me in like an hour, before she leaves for work. I’m not really sure what I’m going to write here, but I’m sure it’ll be interesting because I’m dead tired.
Well, there’s this side room between my sister’s room and mine. It was full of junk (bullshit). We spent almost all night taking every bit of it, hauling it down the stairs and onto the porch for a nice trip (several?) to the dump tomorrow (What am I saying? Tomorrow? We’ll be on our way to the dump in like 4 hours lol) Fortunately it was dark when the stuff went out. If we had happened to see what our porch looked like in broad daylight, our self-esteem would have certainly dropped and would have inevitably ended up looking for a trailer to live in. We look like scumbags. I know it. The front porch is literally filled with crap that we just packed away in plain sight with full hallway blocking involved. I don’t understand how that many random objects could fit into one room, because it barely fit on a 12’ x 24’ porch. I’m just glad it’s all going to be gone tomorrow.
Oh boy, it better be gone tomorrow. I will not stand for that much shrapnel and debris resting on my front porch for more than a few hours. I will not allow myself to be associated with that type of people – those trailers that have year-round garage sales. No. It’s disgusting. If I have to burn the porch down to get rid of it, then so be it. I will not dwell in a home that has an anterior bullshit display-case. It’s bad enough there are trailers on my road. I refuse to let their complacency rub off on me – to allow myself to be dragged down to that level.
Broken windows. As you roam the streets, you see this sign of neglect – this sign of the attitude of those around you. It speaks to you of what’s to come in the not-too-distant future. I suppose there was a time when trailers were a respectable place to live. But too many broken windows – too many fractured minds – have left nothing but degenerating gene pools.
Well, the sun is rising. I can see the first light of day through my window. I can’t recall the last time the waking sun’s rays have reached my restless eyes. It must have been when I worked at the hardware store. Oh the horror of it. Waking up in order to arrive at work by 7:00am – simply horrid. Who buys hardware at 7:00am? I’ll tell you who. People who have absolutely nothing better to do than consume various plastic and cheap metal products. Nothing disgusted me more than arriving to open the store at 6:45am only to find people waiting at the front doors.
How weak-willed I am. I’ve got to sleep. I guess I will go lay down for a little bit – just a nap. Nothing more.
That had to be the funniest thing I’ve heard/read/written in such a long time. Especially the part about the “anterior bullshit display-case.” LOL