Home > All, Philosophy > On A Growing Phenomenon

On A Growing Phenomenon

I have bore witness to a growing trend in human “evolution.” I use the word evolution loosely because it’s not so much as an improvement as it is similar to a disease or infection. It is incredibly disturbing to say the least. I will elaborate.

It’s 4:00 AM. The kids are sleeping. The sun is just barely showing a hint of arriving. Suddenly, the block is jolted out of bed. “What is it,” you ask? An earthquake? A crash of lightening? No, this is much worse. It’s the fat, welfare-ridden, worthless wife across the street screaming at the top of her lungs. It happens everyday, almost like clockwork. There always seems to be something to scream about at 4 in the morning, and it’s necessary to run out into the yard with the husband to do it. Unless people are woken up by her bitching, the chemicals in her brain will not cease be produced.

Is this some type of primordial instinct that hasn’t been drowned out by millions of years of evolution? And also, it seems to be getting worse. The screaming seems to last all day long. The female shows no signs of fatigue whatsoever. Even nearing the late evening hours it still continues.

It has been reported that this attitude originated in the first trailer parks. It has seemed to creep into urban America.

There are also other symptoms of this disease/chemical imbalance that seem to shortly follow. For instance, children with misshapen heads who seem incredibly fascinated with karate. It develops as they grow older. They insist on starting brawls with passersby. Their families also seem to be strangely overweight. Shame is definitely not inherent in their minds. For example, many of them have herpes all over their faces and they engage in sexual activities with all who share the same afflictions. The show of affection in public is commonplace. Not that it’s unusual for the average person, but with the combination of STD’s covering their faces and their obese body type makes for a horrid display.

This sickness is tainting America’s collective unconcious and ruining the property value. Action must be taken if we’re to save our country.

On A Solution

Although this is a difficult problem to deal with I propose a solution.

Since these people (luckily) cannot afford their own housing, they are forced to rent. It’s best to complain to the landlord the instant you notice the aforementioned symptoms. Indifference only enhances the behavior. I am not absolutely sure of this, but I have observed that people who associate with the afflicted shortly after start showing signs of the same disease/chemical imbalance. This most definitely could mean that it’s contagious. So, it’s best to stay as far away as possible.

If you complain enough the landlord will be forced to kick them out and they will have to live elsewhere. Soon they will realize that they are unwanted and will hopefully kill themselves. If not, they surely can’t survive not working for too long. They will soon die of starvation.

A word of warning about complaining to the landlord though. This will undoubtedly induce a dramatic increase in the amount of screaming you hear during the day and early morning hours. Stress is a volitile ingredient in her body’s chemistry. One drop and BANG! She’ll be up first thing at 3:00am screaming at her husband about not doing the dishes. Of couse she’ll drag him out into the front yard to do it. It’s making our streets impossible to live in.

We’ve got to save ourselves before it’s too late. Don’t let dirtbags take over! We must stop them at any cost.

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Categories: All, Philosophy
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